The Ruckus

Portly A/C Guy

Considering that we here at The Ruckus benefit greatly from the Internet and technology and also considering that many of you are joining us via some form of Mac-genius, I feel that I would be remiss if I didn’t log in some opinion on the life and passing of co-founder, chairman, and chief executive officer of Apple, Steve Jobs. Death is a cruel lottery that we all have to play. There usually is no rhyme or reason when your number comes up, it just does. I mean think about it, the guy who developed a computer system that doesn’t get sick, gets sick and dies on the same day my Microsoft 7 dies just because I wanted to sneak a quick peak at CountryFedHineys.com…GATES!!!
Initially I was amazed at the outpouring of grief from so many different sectors, I mean come on, he didn’t give his stuff away for free. Seriously, I was just able to afford the upgrade to a refurbished iPhone 3GS, I must say though, I love it! So why the outpouring? I’ll tell you why, because he lived life the way it should be lived, dream it, do it. Don’t get me wrong, ”Dream it, do it”  doesn’t mean you have to make money and change the world, it means if you dream of travel, travel. If you dream of knowledge, learn but if your dream is actually of changing the world, first dream of changing yourself.  How can you know what the world needs if you don’t know what you need? Think about it, can you even figure what your wife or girlfriend needs? I’ll answer that, no. No my friends, here’s your path to changing the world, think about what you need and if it doesn’t exist, create it, odds are someone else needed it too but was too lazy or stupid to invent it.
Picture this, it’s sometime many years ago, there’s a fat guy sitting in his favorite chair. It’s Summer and it’s hot, for comedy sake let’s say hot as Satan’s mother’s vagina or whatever less crude folksy hot comparison you want to draw. This poor fat bastard is sitting there sweating his ass off, he is wallowing in a slimy pond of his own sweat and filth. Got the picture? So there he is, sure he has a fan but when it’s really hot, a fan just pushes around hot air. It was on a day like this that I’m sure (not sure enough for you to look it up but sure enough for this comedic premise) that a fat sweaty bastard like our fellow said in a labored mucusy voice “Oh no, there has got to be a better way! I know…I’m going to invent a box that blows cold air.” And because of that irresponsibly fat man’s needs (once again, don’t look it up) the air conditioner was born! I submit to you, speaking as an overweight person myself, the air conditioner was one of the most important inventions of the 20th century and yet we don’t even know the inventor’s name.
Pardon my digression but let me try to make sense of what I’ve said and end this rant. Jobs, deserves the accolades, deserves his place in history as do all who change the world for good. Let’s remember though that you don’t have to be Jobs to change the world. If you want to honor Jobs, don’t do Jobs, do you! To the manwith the apple as his epithet I say “Thank you!” …
BTW – I looked up the modern air conditioner. The guy pictured above invented it…A lil’ portly. On behalf of fat guys everywhere I say we make his epithet bacon. Thank You Mr. Willis Carrier!
What other inventors do you think never got their do? The guy who made mayonnaise? Sweat pant? (Sorry, still thinking like a fat guy) Give us your thoughts.